A. 1 : as long as i know using notepad/PDA till battery fully drain, and then charging will not affect the life span
A:2 : laptops/notebooks have inverter to reclaim power from battery when AC fails, also over charge protection circuits.
it is advisable to do not always put laptops on AC adapters, let them have some test of battery juice for some amount.
A 3: No software in market that enhance battery lifetime, also battery lifespan depends on temperature , environment changes ,etc.
the software avail in market that claim to enhance battery lifetime, it actually disable rarely usable hardware, so u can use system on battery last longer.
++ : do not remain insert battery in laptop/pda if you plan to not use for log time (more than 20 days)