Unfortunately, this is a sad truth about Java. And one of the reasons why I try to avoid Java as much as possible on whatever platforms.
But memory usage should be configurable in an app like SQL Developer. I suggest you search through the options and settings carefully.
In OpenOffice, for instance, memory usage may be tweaked, and Java disabled to speed things up:
http://www.zolved.com/synapse/view_content/28209/How_to_make_OpenOffice_run_faster_in_UbuntuIn general, however, speed boost should ironically be expected from using more memory, not less.
The best idea I ever came across for fastening things up would be to try and use OpenGL for the rendering of IDEs in large GUI driven programmes. This should be possible for all Java applications. Here's a guide:
http://ubuntuforums.org/showthread.php?t=1129187On installing, have you configured a swap partition for this Ubuntu? Seized around 2 Gb should be perfect. Sounds like you would need it.
Lastly, here are some general Ubuntu speedup tips:
http://www.chinwong.com/index.php?/site/article/ubuntu_speed_up_tips/